Is Romance only on TV now????

Just finished watching the season finale of the bachelorette. Have to say I picked this guy for her from the beginning, there was just that special look between them. Odds say that it won't last although aren't we all secretely hoping that what they've found will be real once the cameras are off. All of our own romantic dreams are tied up in their success which is why I think we all still love to hear about Trista & Ryan because even though this experiment has failed so many times it worked once so there is hope for the rest of us. Actually she was pretty lucky to have three good looking, successful, and wonderful guys that wanted to be with her. I'm looking for just one and some may think I'm crazy but I know he's out there. I know I've heard the statistics that I stand a better chance of being hit by lightening or killed by a terrorist but I'll take my odds. Here is my question though... Men my age are all denying that they aren't boys anymore and are pursuing women that are almost half my age. Don't they realize that women their own age are awesome too and even can understand what they are talking about although we may not laugh hysterically at everything that they say because we actually have thoughts as well...ok enough preaching. This next show that's on Dating in the Dark I watched for the first time last week and I thought what a great concept until I watched the end. How cruel is this when you get to know someone in the dark and really connect on an emotional level and for one couple a definite physical level. Then you see each other for just a few seconds and then when one of you waits on the balcony while the other decides if they are going to come out and meet you face to face or walk out the front door. The one couple that had spent most of their time making out and gushing to the housemates about how wonderful they each are and she walked out the door and left him just hanging. My heart broke for him so I won't watch anymore, but I applaud these people for stepping out of their comfort zone and trying something new. I'm still trying the approach that prince charming will show up at my door someday. I still have more work to do on learning to really like myself before opening my heart up to someone else. Ok now what I'm grateful for today. At work we have these wonderful floor to ceiling windows and I was able to watch this gigantic forceful storm move its way in and take over the environment around us. It was truly amazing! I love storms and just wish that it was safe to be out in the middle of them because that is where I would be. Feeling the wind intensify just before the rains start is purifying and if it wasn't for that pesky lightening I could enjoy them alot more...just kidding. Yesterday I said I wanted to be productive and I was so woohoo for me!! My goal for this next couple of weeks is to do one thing each day for me so that I can come to that place where I'll be ready to open my heart to someone else so this all begins tomorrow and if you have any suggestions let me know. Your word for tomorrow will be abnegation which is something that every parent practices. Until tomorrow.....

Welcome to my Daily Wishes and thoughts

Ok, I just turned 46 yesterday and I'm really not sure how that happened. When I was younger someone that was 46 was old...am I old? I don't feel any different then I did when I was 30 but there are definitely signs such as having to wear these ugly reading glasses and not being able to stay up late anymore but those are little insignificant changes. Other than that I feel pretty good but the biggest reminder that I'm getting a little older is the fact that my children are now 22 and 19. Can't be 29 with them being that old...just kidding. I've never been one of those people that try to hide my age so I've embraced each year. Actually the only year that even affected me was when I turned 25 which meant that I was a quarter of a century old. I won't kid you..that day I was a little depressed but the others have come and went without even a tear. My goal thru this journal is to start my journey and take you with me if you want to tag along. First I was a daughter, then a wife, and mother. Now it's my turn to try all the things that I've wanted to. I'm not afraid of failing and it might even be kind of interesting. I've always only pursued things that I knew I could be successful at. This will be a time of change and I'll promise to not make it sappy. I'm going to end with something each day that I was thankful about and a wish for tomorrow. Of course I am always thankful for my children, health, friends and right now for having a job (even if its one I don't really like) These grateful notes will be something little and unexpected. Today I am thankful for the thunderstorms that lasted for most of the afternoon and kept us all at home which doesn't happen that often. My wish for tomorrow is that I'm productive at work and get to the tag office without getting a ticket to renew my tag which I thought was good until the end of the month but actually expired on my birthday...wish me luck.